The End
by missingkitsune
Summary: Shunsui's over flowing grief


A/N: Bleach and all characters belong to Tite Kubo. Based on this piece of work.

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The end

After the Quincies were defeated, the remainder of the Gotei-13 rested a few days before joining in on the clean up of the Soul Society. It would take them years to fix the damage that had been inflicted onto their homes and squads.

Soon there was a decision to set up memorial stones for the three captains who had sacrificed their lives in order to save many. Some it seemed to be all for nothing but there was no way to go back and change what had happened.

The first stone to go up was the former Captain-Commander. Shikigani Yamamoto. There were lots of tears in the gathered crowd of squad members: some who were just barely out of bed, including the man making the tribute. The new Captain-Commander Shunsui Kyoraku.

As he read off all the old man's accomplishments his lower lip trembled and his voice faltered at times. It was hard to look as the stone engraved with his name was lifted into place. This was the first, and they were just going to get harder as the day went on.

A light touch on his arm brought him back to reality as his mind had drifted off a little bit. Shunsui nodded at Nanao and continued after clearing his throat. And patted the stone. He'd miss his mentor and father figure.

They were all going to miss the stern old man.

Next memorial was for the captain of squad 4, Retsu Unohana. Shunsui wasn't sure he'd be able to read this commemoration. His part in her death weighed heavily on his heart. At the sight of the stone and the weeping face, Shunsui merely hung his head and pulled his hat lower over his face. He just couldn't bring himself to say words of comfort to the gathered squads. Most had no idea he had sent her to her death in the training of Kenpachi Zaraki.

Fortunately Rose Otoboshi stepped up to read her memorial with added flourishes. Several people began to openly cry, which made Shunsui feel even worse as he faded into the crowd as they were raising the stone with her name engraved on it.

A large hand landed on his shoulder and he glanced up into Kenpachi's face. "It had to be done that way man. No one needs to know but it ain't your fault"

"I appreciate that Ken-chan, but it doesn't ease my heart. This day is just a reminder of all that we lost." Zaraki nodded at him and walked away. It was strange also to not see the small tuft of pink riding on his shoulders. Who would have guessed that she was actually his sword. No wonder she was so strong.

As the gathering began to move on to the final stone. Shunsui ran a hand across the top of the stone and made a whispered apology to his dear friend.

This last one was going to be a terrible one to get through. How do you say goodbye to your best friend and lover. He'd rather have died than have Ukitake give up his life the way he did.

He was going to be the last speaker at this memorial. Rukia-chan went first. Her voice wavered, Shunsui could feel his own body tremble. He was wound tight like a bow string; ready to snap apart at any moment.

The speeches went on. One by one each captain gave a final farewell to the man with the kindest eyes and the biggest heart. It hurt to see them so stoic, but fond. He was mildly impressed that even the captain of squad 12 gave a fond speech. But Ukitake was like that. He was well liked by all. It had always been that way since they first meet at the academy.

Then there was silence. They were all watching him. Robot like; he moved forward. His voice failed him for a few moments.

"This is a hard day for all. We've all lost someone we cared about. There'll be no more soft words. No more kind smiles. No more secret candy stashes." He shot a glance at Captain Hitsugaya; his head was hanging low. The sorrow rolling off his shoulders like a fine mist. "Yes we've all lost someone we care about. These losses are immeasurable to those bearing the pain. But we must strive to move forward. They all would have wanted us to move beyond this point." He nervously scratched at his chin. "So we move on with our fond farewells hanging in the air on this pleasant evening. We rebuild and make ourselves stronger for the loss. We need to move onward and upward. We can not let our sorrow guide us." Shunsui sighed deeply; inhaling the light scent of flowers in the breeze. " Let us not dwell on the past for they gave their all that we could grow strong."

"Ukitake was my best friend since we met at the academy. Most of you know the story by now. He was smart and kind to all. There was a way about him that just made you like him. His kindness knew no bounds and he shared freely with all. Even hindered as he was by the thing that felled him." His voice hitched a bit. "My friend would want us to go on and make the Soul Society better. So we will. We build in their honor, we breath in their honor, we live in their honor. Let us not dwell here but go forth and live a full life." He bowed his head and stepped away.

He stood silent as practically every soul in the Soul Society said their final farewells. He was going to snap. He felt a tear start and brushed it away hastily. Nanao at his side; brushed his sleeve.

"Captain?"

"I'm fine, Nanao."

"No! You're not but I'm right here, please be strong just a bit longer." He simply nodded.

After an hour passed the last person had said good bye. He felt his body unravel. He leaned against the stone and let loose a howl of anguish. Dropping to his knees he held himself upright with his hand still on the stone. His despair flowed unchecked as tears ran down his face unheeded.

It took a while but he gathered himself back to a semblance of his former self. He retired to his quarters to rest for the remainder of the evening.

A gentle breeze came through the open windows as he fell into a restless slumber.

A sudden noise startled him awake. He patted the open area on his bed; wishing desperately that it wasn't as empty as it seemed... but it remained empty.

Wearing just his shinigami uniform; he grabbed a sake bottle and two cups and went back up the hill to that spot. He poured two cups. Holding the tiny cup in his hand he gave a final, final farewell, even though he knew at this moment that this was going to become a routine thing from here on out.

He talked to the lingering spirit of Jushiro Ukitake. For hours he sipped sake and spoke to him. It was a one sided conversation, but it helped him feel clearer. He felt better after unloading his hearts aches.

They would move on. They would be better. It was wonderful.


End file.
